Reader,

In last week’s email, I talked about my friend Martin, whose wife died suddenly four years ago.

This past Thursday, on the anniversary of Suzanne’s death, Martin and I talked on the phone. He shared what the past four years have been like for him.

Martin also forwarded a text to me that he received from the hospital about Suzanne’s passing.

Hi, Hans. Since Suzanne died, your brain has had to reconstruct its map of the world without her in it.
Neurobiologist Mary-Frances O'Connor studies the neurophysiology of grief and shares that this reconstruction happens in your brain.
This means your brain must wrestle with the fact that Suzanne can't be located on a map, even though you may still expect her to be in familiar places and may find yourself searching for her.
Grieving can be thought of as a form of learning, and one day the world will feel whole again, as hard as that is to imagine now.

Martin said he found this helpful. I did, too.

It makes me think of other friends of mine who have lost loved ones and how they are forming “new maps.” It’s certainly a painful process, one that I want to be sensitive to.

If you missed my email/blog post from last week and would like to see a brief TV video clip of Martin talking about Suzanne and meeting her organ recipients, Click here.

Until next week, I wish you all the joy that you can wish.*

John Certalic

Also, for new subscribers, here are links to the two podcast episodes that tell the story of Martin and Suzanne and my relationship with them.

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​071: How to Help a Grieving Friend​
​072: What I Learned From a Grieving Friend​

You Were Made for This is the podcast sponsored by Caring for Others, a missionary care ministry.

* The Merchant of Venice, Act III, scene 2